I arrived at Billund Airport on the 8th August, 10:45 AM. My plan was to get to Fredericia (where my friend lived) at about 4:30 PM.After collecting my luggage, I left it with the baggage services at the airport and proceeded to the information desk and asked the woman there, ‘How do I get to Fredericia?’ She suggested I take the 3:00 PM bus from the airport. I agreed and took the print-out with me.I have never used public transport in my life.To waste a bit of time I decided to go to Legoland which was nearby.

No-one told me it was going to be a stupid little children’s amusement park with absolutely no scary rides! I ended up sitting in the compartment of a silly train taking a tour of Legoland while the parents and children in the other compartments were probably thinking, ‘What a sad person…’

So much for Legoland. I left at 2:30 (to be on the safe side) and went to the bus station. 3 o’ clock ticked by and no bus came. I checked the print-out and - bugger - I was supposed to catch the bus from the airport, NOT from Legoland.

Trying to resolve my current problem, I asked the girl beside me if she would tell me when the next bus to Vejle would come. She started stuttering and replied with phrases such as ‘Sorry, I can’t help you’.

Great, now I’ve got another problem to deal with - she thinks I’m trying to hit on her.

After convincing her that I wasn’t going to do anything to her, she finally gave me the information I wanted: 40 minutes.

I waited for 40 minutes, and the bus came this time. I got on, sat down, and relaxed. ‘Finally, on my way,’ I thought. But, something’s wrong… something’s missing… but, what… Then I remembered and nearly shouted out, ‘F**K! My luggage is still in the airport!’

I ran up to the bus driver and ordered him to cease and desist (in a polite way of course). I explained my situation and he stopped the bus and let me off. I found myself in the middle of a road.

I looked left and saw the road leading to the horizon. I looked right and saw a bus accelerating into the distance. Behind me a sign pointed left bearing a picture of a black plane and the words ‘Lufthavn 4′.

Thus began my 4 kilometre walk to the airport. After walking and walking, I found myself in front of a big sign - ‘LEGOLAND’.

After more walking (and going the wrong way) I came to yet another sign - ‘Lufthavn 2′. Despite the current predicament, I was quite happy at this point. Half-way there…

And so I carried on for another kilometre until I could see the first indications of an airport - the metal gates, the hangars, planes above. Nearly there…

At last the airport entrance came into view and I trudged in, sweating. I went to the information and asked once again, ‘How do I get to Fredericia?’

(don’t worry - I made it this time)